I wanted to record my wins for 2024 since I often get caught up in what others think of me or my own expectations for myself. This page is for my inner child 😊 and also inner attention hoe

June

  • Reproduced SWE-bench from scratch. (although copied heavily from their repo)
  • Decided to go on less dates
  • Went to Korea for a friend’s wedding. Enjoyed their special day and the lovely cafes throughout Seoul. Got a facial and lots of skincare/makeup to bring back
  • Setting my telic goals for 2024. It feels like this time around I’ll actually stick with it. My goals as of June 5, 2024 are a 209 day streak to:
    • meditate 1hr/day
    • exercise 1hr/day. walking or stretching count
    • spaced repetition cards complete daily
    • no more shows/movies, unless it’s a group hangout
    • some other ones I won’t share here

May

  • Decided to commit to this project on programming evals heavily inspired by SWE-bench, for the next 2 months
  • Made more songs
  • Went on more dates
  • Meditation streak continues, and upping it :) Been ~7 days in a row meditating ~20 minutes within the first hour of waking up. I hope to keep it up.
  • Have continued going weekly to qi gong.
  • Experiments complete
  • Proposals - tweaked most of them

Some days I wake up with a lot of anxiety and uncertainty, but there are gradually more days per month that are painted with love, delight, bemusement, play. Someone said to me that I felt this way because I was trying hard to make my life perfect and…when I sat with the statement, I felt some hard knot dissolved inside of me.

April

I’ve decided I want to complete 100 experiments and their write-ups by the end of the year. Just got to get those reps in, ya know. This means (90 exp / 8 months) = average of 11.25 experiments / month.

This month has been crazy productive. On top of that I’ve been feeling so much energy.

I am fascinated by how much more productive I’ve been on certain things like programming projects, when my cup is overflowing in other areas like music. Activities B, C, D taking up more time seems to give more energy to do Activity A. I think this is how I felt in high school, running between classes and chorus and fencing (this was another era). It was a lot but they seemed to balance each other out. In college, that balance was lost / less externally reinforced, which led to a massive mental and physical rut for years. It feels like 8 years later, I’m finally regaining control of my mind and body.

March

February

I spent a lot of time this month catching up with family I’d been neglecting during the startup journey in the last few years. I lived with my parents in SoCal, celebrated Chinese New Year with my relatives in Los Angeles, and caught up with my cousin in San Francisco. I am always shocked how similar I am to my relatives. Our speech patterns, our cheekbones, our boisterous laughter. Patterns of guilt and shame. Body language of showing affection. Maybe it is surprising to me because I spend so much time away from family, working with people whose cultural and geographical backgrounds are so different from mine. My chest feels warm when I think of them.

January

So much happened this month!

πŸ₯΅ I remind myself daily to slow down, because I feel my tendency is to move too fast. I suppose when you’re having a good time, you can get wild amounts of stuff done! There are also a lot of open threads too, and I remind myself that it’s ok to be in the β€˜explore’ phase, as long as I am fulfilling my commitments to others.